I have decided to spend tomorrow trying to align with my primitive side. For this exercise, I'll need a viable simulacrum of wilderness and a fair amount of wildlife in order to attune myself properly. What all this means, for all of you who enjoy participating in the infrequent Spot The Necromancer contests, is that the Bronx Zoo will be a likely setting for anyone wishing to contest tomorrow. The prize this time? Hmmm... Spot me, approach, and you may have one wish... How's that?

For all the rest, may you have a good weekend.

I found one of the books in my Amazon Wishlist free for the taking in the freebie cubicle... First time that's happened. I would love for that to happen more frequently. Like daily, maybe...

For those joining late, a full explanation on the term "freebie cubicle" may be found here.

I feel sort of apprehensive... I've learned throughout the years that this usually means that my immune system is fighting off a godawful disease so that I won't even notice it. I'm hoping it's an updated version of the Black Plague or an equally virulent pestilence... Just because I hate feeling apprehensive and will take it out on the innocents. Going to head down to the cafeteria where I'll unobtrusively lick the clean silverware... Start spreading the joy...

Nothing says 'I love you' quite as much as sending body parts by post...

There's a ritual ceremony I always perform within the first month of the new year... It is meant to restore my energy, strengthen the protective circles around me and focus all those spirits of luck, mayhem, sex, music, good food and the like which I wish to continue attracting to me. Haven't gotten around to it, and the month is almost over... Looks like it'll have to be Friday... Mainly cause it's a Friday... The one good thing about my current abode is that it's right next to a cemetary. That is soooooo convenient!!!!

Today has been a fun day, first my earlier post, and now... I'd been waiting for the shit to hit the fan regarding something in which I was not directly involved, but which I did have secondhand knowledge of. I love it when my prophecies come true...

People are so stupid... Just in general... Now, HR people, they make the people in general look like regular Einsteins... It is amazing what some morons are capable of putting into an official, company email as an official response to an HR related question. Do they not train these people and explain that some stuff is, in fact, illegal, and that while many companies do engage in such behavior it should not be written in clear, uncertain terms on an email that comes from an HR rep? Ye Gods...

Seems there was this nasty biker riding his Harley down the icy highway one cold day in Colorado, when he spotted a cat lying in the middle of the road. The biker thought to himself, "I'll cut that cat in two," and he bore down on it hard.

As he got closer, though, he suddenly realized that it was not a cat, but a large piece of metal lying in the road. Too late! His front wheel plowed into it and he was sent flying over the handlebars and onto the road at 80 MPH.

When he arrived in Hell, the person welcoming the new arrivals was the Devil himself. As the Devil shook the ex-biker's hand, he asked mockingly, "So, how do you like it here?"

The bad old biker replied, "Man, this is one COOL place!"

The old Devil was just a little miffed at this upstart, so he decided to crank up the thermostat a notch. The next day, the Devil sought out the biker and asked, "So, how do you like it now?"

The biker responded by saying, "This is great! Reminds me of the rough rides in the desert during the hot afternoons in August."

Naturally, the Devil was only more angered, and cranked the heat up as far as it could go. The next day, Hell was unbelievable.

Even some demons were melting into the floor. The Devil again found the biker, and asked how he was holding up. Undaunted, the biker proclaimed, "It's almost as hot as the time I beat and robbed those vacationers out in Death Valley. I love it!"

By now the Devil was just furious, so he turned the thermostat all the way down. Way down! As far down as could ever be imagined.

The next morning, he tracked down the biker again and asked, "OK, smarty, how do you like it NOW?"

With icicles hanging from every part of his body, the biker shivered and chattered, "W-w-w-what h-h-hhappened, d-d-d-did the Buc's f-f-finally w-w-win the Super Bowl?"

They should ban the Raiders from any championships for the next 5 years. That would measurably improve professional football to the benefit of fans everywhere.

Man, if I were the Raiders' owner, they'd all be without a job as soon as the game is over. It's pitiful the way they're playing. It's so pathetic I decided my time was better spent online. There's still the better part of 8 minutes left of the 4th quarter as I write this...

It's Friday. Not much more to say beyond that. I'm sure someone did something stupid today and I could say something witty about it here, but I'm too eager to be gone to even consider hunting for an apt newsbyte on CNN. Have fun, boys and girls, and check back tomorrow, I'll probably be in a more writerish mood by then...

I love it when a company's values, as in core beliefs, change according to the dynamics of the market. At one point in time, it was advantageous for the knockoffs to flood the market instead of their direct competitors' products positioning themselves, so they ignored this with Olympian disdain. Now, with money tight, it seems that the cheap knockoffs are piracy!!!

Damn. Stupid W-2 finally arrived. About time...

I love caviar. Especially pigging out on it... Nice dollops of it on itsy bitsy pieces of anything else... Even some just straight off a spoon... I love it... It's almost gone... A tad less than 2 ounces... A tad less than 15 minutes and counting... I love caviar...

Jesus wept and died!!! LMAO I sincerely hope this is a put on, but just in case it isn't...

And in case any of you boys might really want to be girls, or vice versa... There's a school for that....

This is so sad yet so true... We do see the planet like this.

I have always, at some deep level, held the strong belief that stupidity must be publicized. Glorified, even. If for no other purpose than serving as a warning for future generations. That explains why I subscribe to the Bonehead of the Day Award list, and why I go every now and then to the Darwin Awards website.

Now, my employer deserves a website dedicated to all the different ways they screw things up, and make life a living hell for their customers and employees. Unfortunately, that would be a fulltime job, in and of itself, and I doubt they'd be stupid enough to pay for it. Yeah, I know, I did say they were stupid, but all things have limits.

I sometimes think of starting a blog about their antics, but I would have to retroactively update it from back in Oct 2000 when I first heard of the company, a good 6 months before I even started working for them, when I was the customer... I'll have to think and see if it's worthwhile or not... Plus, complain as I do about their stupidity and sheer unworthiness, the pay's good and the economy being what it is, I doubt I'd find a similarly well paying job out there right now... So... Am I supposed to be too grateful to put up the blog? Or does stupidity and contemptible behavior justify me? Which is it?

Example from yesterday: I learned a good month ago from one of my erstwhile co-workers at my previous account that they had been notified of their pending dismissal in Feb 2003, part of a new round of downsizing. As I said, she told me this at least a month ago. Yesterday she commented that she'd be going to Canada for training, and to wish her luck. I did so, and asked if that meant that she had found an opportunity within the company and was no longer under threat for next month. I figured why give training to someone we're going to fire? She said that, no, what she meant is that she'd be going to Canada to train the group that would be replacing them. Her group's jobs are moving north because it's so much cheaper to hire Canadians than Americans, I guess.

Is it just me? Am I the only one who thinks it's really fucked up to tell you you're being fired because they found someone 5% cheaper up north, but since they're untrained can you go and teach them before we trash you?

Maybe there is a God... I'll let you all know tomorrow, or sometime during the weekend...

For some reason, my mind is playing back to me U2's complete repertoire... And don't get me wrong, I do enjoy U2 quite a lot, I like their music... However, I don't usually advertise that fact because I have always felt ashamed (even though it's not my fault) that the singer adopted a stage name that could only be appropriate for a trained chimp...

Man, this does bring back some sweet memories... Thanks, Xushie!! And, yeah, I already had it in MAME, original ROMS and all, but I never have the time... Getting it as a link and clicking on it made me forget about the job for a good half hour and relive the fever...

There are quite a few folks I would cheerfully gift with one of these...

Have I ever said that pissing people off is its own reward? I have? Okay, then. Just wanted to make sure... LOL

Nothing is so inherently satisfying as some bureaucratic nincompoop explaining carefully to me why I can't do things the way I'd planned, only for him to get a call from his manager shortly to explain why, unfortunately, things will have to be done my way. It bloody rocks. I still hate the company, though, but these small victories make it bearable...

California apparently has a site up to vote for their State Quarter's design... I wonder why they don't just go with the eagle atop the cactus that the rest of Mexico uses?

From an article on CNET about a technology that allows stores (and others) to track individual products by radio:

"Imagine, for instance, walking down the sidewalk and having a high-tech billboard flash an ad for ketchup at you because it recognized the package of hotdogs in your bag. Ashton acknowledges that such a scenario--not unlike a scene out of the last year's sci-fi film "Minority Report"--is technically feasible."

To which I just have to add... Why think small? Why not think about the poor woman walking down the street with a whole salami and a jar of vaseline? What sort of ad will she get? Oh, the humanity!

I see dead people...

Is it just me, or do the Brits have utterly too much free time on their hands since we relieved them of the burdens of Empire?

Having been in Venezuela in the recent past, and knowing full well what Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez's (lack of) intelligence is like, I am still amazed at him being that stupid...

Seems I'm not the only one who speaks to the dead... How fitting that it should be my very own Walpurgis...

On the radio this morning... A most wonderful discussion on the topic of stem cell cloning research... And someone hoping that they make fast progress on this, since they'd love to clone isolated body parts instead of the whole shebang, and that in particular, they would pay top dollar for just J.Lo's ass...

The Raelians have announced the birth of yet another human clone... *yawn* B-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-r-i-n-g... Oh! Wait!!! The mothers (yes, plural) are a pair of Dutch lesbians!!!! Part of me is becoming interested... LOL

In an infinite universe, given enough time, anything is bound to happen at least once...

More to the point, I just finished witnessing the first hassle-free full PBX upgrade ever. Hassle-free. Damn. Given my bias, it is a shame it was on an Avaya box instead of a Nortel Networks one, but regardless it is going to make me look pretty good in front of my moronic and idiotic esteemed clients and managers....

Interesting article in the current (FEB03) Discover Magazine, not yet on the web, unfortunately. It substantiates a suspicion I've held for decades now. Humanity evolved over a period of millions of years into what we are today. During that period, we were exposed to and interacted with different micro-organisms. Some of these, as we all know, cause disease. Others are beneficial, having evolved into a symbiotic relationship with us.

That's not news. The article highlights, though, a bacteria found in the stomach which is known to cause ulcers in a small percentage of the population and in rarer cases, gastrointestinal cancer. Due to increased hygiene, as well as broad application of antibiotics, this bacterium is being erradicated. Some recent studies suggest that the bacteria, even though harmful in some limited cases, is at the same time preventing other afflictions among all the population. Among these afflictions, Asthma, and that the bacteria's slow erradication during the past decades could explain the rise in asthma cases during the same period.

I have always held the position that this extreme fixation people now have with cleanliness is not healthy. It has long been argued that our immune system needs to have a workout and that by being too hygienic we are doing more harm than good to ourselves. If true, this new discovery would hint at even greater perils attached to our supposed victory over some micro-organisms. And think about it... Why would it not be true? This is a creature that has been a part of our stomach flora for who knows how long. If it was still there a short time ago, odds are that we had a working relationship with it.

Maurizio Minghella is free!!!! Run, man! Run!!

Well... Does anyone else notice a weird smell? Sort of rancid? Damn... I hope we didn't get saddled with an about to expire year...